To provide 'beta' men an incentive to produce far more economic output than needed just to support themselves while simultaneously controlling the hypergamy of women that would deprive children of interaction with their biological fathers, all major religions constructed an institution to force constructive conduct out of both genders while penalizing the natural primate tendencies of each. This institution was known as 'marriage'. Societies that enforced monogamous marriage made sure all beta men had wives, thus unlocking productive output out of these men who in pre-modern times would have had no incentive to be productive. Women, in turn, received a provider, a protector, and higher social status than unmarried women, who often were trapped in poverty. When applied over an entire population of humans, this system was known as 'civilization'.
Thank you for linking this, it is very good. It is true that these dynamics were present even then, but as some say, markets have a tendency to remain irrational longer than one would expect.
For all who don't like coarse language and want more charts, please read!
His January 1, 2020 followup unpacked what's actually happened in those ten years very well. It's also obvious that in those ten years he's become intimately familiar with the Manosphere, which really emerged as a phenomenon of its own over that decade.
Men were shamed too, in the form of simply being killed for not fulfilling their masculine end of the civilizational contract. There has never been a time in which men lived without being under the threat of serious shame.
How old are you traditionists? I am old enough to know how unhappy marriages were in the 1950s. Your fantasy concept of how it all was is just that - a fantasy. The stress on men was very high. Women were bored and unfulfilled. You should be trying to make a more egalitarian society work well. Your little project is doomed because you make men more and more irrelevant.
You didn't even understand the point of his essay. He never mentioned happiness of individuals; he is discussing the importance of incentives that enable civilization. You are what, a Boomer? Born into the most economically prosperous era in human history, yet you don't even realize how such a situation comes about practically, which is why the world you are leaving for the following generations is so shit. Your generation is the most entitled and foolish to walk the face of the earth, perhaps ever. Your last sentence that this "little project is doomed because you make men more and more irrelevant" is proof that you totally missed the author's argument. The moment men become irrelevant is the moment the lights shut off and the water stops running. Women as a whole do not have the capacity to maintain civilizational infrastructure. You are probably incensed by this article because you are a mid all grown up, and you hate looking in the rearview mirror to see the damage that the wicked ideology known as feminism has caused.
Boomers did not cause all the problems you ascribe to them. The greatest gen did all the damage. Civil rights movement, the welfare state, relaxed divorce laws. That is the work of boomers
I agree that the so-called greatest gen, as well as the silent gen, laid the groundwork for the societal calamity that has become the U.S. in 2025, however those generations were themselves by and large virtuous people who just had naive principles. The boomers on the other hand have little virtue to speak of as a cohort. Greed, selfishness, materialism, and foolishness are the traits that define the post-war brats. Is it their parents' responsibility that is how they turned out? Perhaps. But a 60+ year-old man who still blames his parents for his behavior is truly a baby masquerading as an adult. A better epithet for those born between '45-'65 may be the babes, for they never weaned off a generous system and now expect men in our 20s to pay for their ice cream and toys.
I was born in 1963. So I am barely a boomer. As a young man I desperately wanted to opt out of the social security ponzi scheme, however that is not possible. I had to pay my dues just like everyone else. Which means I had to pay for the generation before me, just like you will have to do. It was not my decision, nor was it any boomer's decision to comingle the social security trust fund with the general operational budget of the US.
I find these generational comparisons tiresome. THere is no evidence that millennials are more lazy than anyone else. There is no evidence that Gen Z is any better or worse than any other generation. There is no evidence that boomers are uniquely evil in some way that any other generation was. I will note that none of the evil dictators (hitler, stalin, mao) were boomers
Barely a boomer, I respect you if what you are saying is true. When SS is cancelled by a regime more favorable to the interests of young men, I would not be opposed to paying out a dividend to those of your cohort who actually paid into such a system. The issue is that many of your fellows (kids of '63) lived as grasshoppers, fiddling away in the summer of youth and now expect me to pay for a happy retirement that is undeserved. I do not need to give examples, although I could of boomers crying over a supposed "fixed income" which is nothing more than the results of practical foolishness (lack of savings).
It may be tiresome to compare generations if you feel unaligned with yours, although I certainly see many flaws with my peers. However, you grew up in a drastically different culture and society than I did 40 years later, and to ignore how that difference impacts people grouped together even simply by age is a bit facetious. Clearly kids that grew up with only 3 TV channels will have a different outlook than kids that had access to the panoply of the internet. I think what you may find tiresome is realizing is that the world has been on a downward spiral, certainly in a moral sense, since the 60s that has largely continued during your generations period of greatest influence. Perhaps, it did not begin with you, but it has continued under you. Each generation has flaws as well as strengths, and there will be good people born in each era, however, to ignore the differences in culture that I was born into compared with yourself would be naive.
Lol. A whole article about incentives for an anthropomorphized 'civilization' and a complete ignorance of the incentives for half of the individuals who collectively make it up. Blind men and elephants....
I dont necessarily disagree, though I have taken the “traditionalist” route I suppose personally in my life and marriage, as has my wife, but, was it worse, in aggregate, than what we have now, in aggregate? I think too many cats are out of too many bags to actually go full on traditionalist societally, but I think a move in that direction a bit would make things more egalitarian at this point. I also disagree with the author on men not wanting to work hard to keep everything going. I work in a trade anmost of the guys I work with are divorced. Their lives suck but now they have to work extra hard, not less hard.
it's incredible, and the metaphors are delicious. it also forced me to familiarize myself with certain memes/acronyms/neologisms i'm still unfamiliar with.
Why should anyone be shamed? Much less entire groups of people? If an individual does something truly shameful (and that varies from culture to culture, even person to person) then ok, some "shaming" from people who truly care about them might be justified. But personal guilt arising from one's own sense of right and wrong works far more efficiently. Guilt and shame are two different things. Shame based cultures and guilt based cultures are very different.
Individual guilt didn't prevent or stop the atrocities of the Nazis or communists from being repeated. It was shaming their entire nations did it.
The same applies to things which aren't atrocities. Self-contemplation is not as effective as having everyone point and laugh and throw rotten cabbage.
There are a LOT of people who never develop a mature sense of right and wrong, or learn the discipline to follow it; and it only takes one of them to burn down a police station or a place of worship, or in olden times, a barn full of the town’s seed corn. Not everyone is can be a philosopher king or a warrior poet.
Weird dynamic in the contemporary dating scene is that even as the sex rate plummets, so does female attractiveness. It's weird because in essence it's getting harder to find a partner, meaning partners are more expensive. To a considerable degree this is due to men removing themselves from the dating market, or simply not showing up (see: college campuses). Since this imbalance nominally corresponds to women being cheaper commodities for those still in the game, you'd think females would respond by trying to increase their SMV in order to compete, but nah, instead you get green hair, obesity, general personality bitchiness. The feminist mind parasite seems more than capable of motivating destructive female behavior in the face of market pressures. So, this continues for a while, probably.
The other thing, of course, is how many mid men just say fuck it and seek marriageable wives elsewhere? Latin America, Eastern Europe, Asia all offer good alternatives. Somewhat perversely, this could provide the sexual motivation to keep civilization ticking along, while locking white women out of the marriage market. There'd be a certain poetic justice to that.
This has been my basic take for a long time. Women have gotten incredibly demanding at the same time they've gotten incredibly undesirable. The overshoot is amazing and I expect the consequences will be as well.
Absolutely right on the money, Sir! I cannot tell you how prevalent it is for smart men ‘in the know’ to bail for 6 months or so to Thailand, Ukraine(pre-war) even parts of the Middle East and ultimately come merrily home with their bride-to-be in tow! Women in those types of places have not yet been tainted and sullied by the knowledge of the West via the brainwashing of this ‘modern woman’ farce foisted upon girls here starting in the 80’s by society convincing them that “girl, you don’t need no man!” “You getcha’ college degree and you’ll be independent and thus never be happier!” What a fucking load of shit that is! This world is turned upside down on it’s head in every way, as this is an integral part of the overall larger, horrific, shitshow maelstrom we’ve got bearing down on us as men……buckle up, cause it’s gonna be a bumpy road!
Yes, by far the best bet for most is to find a nice girl in such regions. Problem is finding such women, clueless travelers might meet the wrong types via adverse selection.
It might be possible for men in the know to more quickly coordinate such attractive matches ... one American man introduces the nice cousin of his Uruguayan wife to another, etc. This would not be difficult to implement publicly with e.g. a website, could also be more informal. Enterprising men wishing to make a positive impact — this may be one such approach.
Agreed…of course. Fittingly, there’s a famous Polish saying as follows : Każdy horror ma swojego kochanka. Translated it means - “Every horror has her lover” meaning that no matter how terribly undesirable, unattractive, unbecoming and a cum dumpster skank a woman is, there is always some chump to give her the time of day. Women will always have that power of the P! The saying is much more powerful and meaningful when said in Polish to a Pole, but you get the idea…Anyway, yes, careful selection of a girl brought up in a strict household not exposed to too much ‘Western’ culture is the key or at least finding one that is studiously aware of the pitfalls of the ‘Modern independent woman’ lie is of utmost importance and said quest must be undertaken with the utmost diligence, patience and caution for a long term successful wife/mother of one’s progeny!
This is a nice idea in theory, until you actually experience the difficultly of cross-cultural relationships. Even for couples who are both from Europe(Finn/Italian or Irish/Spanish), cross-cultural differences can be challenging to maintaining a relationship long-term.
There can also be other problems: I know a group of a few American men who all found Thai women and brought them back to the US to marry. The women were very sweet & subservient until after the marriages when they all turned into raging harpies.
totally agree with you, but let's not forget that there are a multitude of forces driving this phenomenon you describe of degrading average female desirability. it's not entirely ideologically-driven, or at least, it's not entirely driven by the evil known as 'feminism'.
That's certainly true. Like most phenomena, it has a multivariate origin. In fact, I'd argue that feminism as an ideological driving force is itself much more symptom than cause. Economics, adulteration of the food supply, side effects from the Pill and SSRIs, all play an important role at both biological and psychological levels.
i don't know enough to comparatively weigh the varying forces driving this degradation of female (and male?) attractiveness, but of course you're listing massive drivers. we're definitely on the same page.
Given that these drivers are not actually going away, it seems that the breakdown in the 'civilizational contract' between Men and Women will also not go away, even when it has negative outcomes for individuals and society as a whole. In this case, the cultural and sociological conforming forces would need to be set against the underlying causes, rather than reinforcing them. But its an uphill battle...
For those young man, be very careful with Brazil. The country in Latin America which is the one most obsessed in copying every single bad idea from America.
Brazilian laws are deeply misandrist, the judges are worse and the woman in some states are complete buccaneers.
I see WAY more women with plastic surgery than with green hair.
The bitchy, obese, green-haired stereotype is not trying to date typical men anyway... They date in their trans/nonbinary/pansexual circles. This is a red herring.
It seems like you are ignoring that the dating market as a whole is a bad bargain for women. Why would they engage in it if all they get from it is more work?
Okay, but I like green hair and forceful personalities, and the obesity is the result of another bad idea we unnecessarily adopted during the Mid-20th Century.
one look at some of the popular culture from the 50s to 70s shows how precipitous the fall has been. Demure, graceful and modest women who spoke with a sing song cadence - thinking of Star trek and the twilight zone - has given way to shrill, obnoxious, unfeminine, neurotic and undesirable femoids from the 90s onwards who think that playpen between their legs is itself enough to make them a prize for anyone. I wonder how and when this happened or if this was a result of conscious and subtle social engineering after the sexual liberation movement.
Unfortunately, he unexpectedly passed away in May but his channel lives on in infamy! Kevin is SO well versed on this subject and is flat-out hilarious to boot! I cannot recommend him highly enough!
Unexpectedly died, you say? Sounds like a p-zombie to me. And we're not considering what the Midwit Remover, sold as protection against the Boomer Remover, is going to do to this dynamic over the next decade. Less likely to kill those with XX karyotypes, it's also clearly causing mass infertility.
Think being an outlier is sold as sexy now? Wait until 10 years of actual fertility backs it up. That stripper stat was an amazing data point for me.
Agreed. Both men and women are happiest in a solid marriage with children and the traditional family structure.....in fact I believe it is the healthiest way to live.
Truly great and insightful piece. Instant subscribe from me. You were able to conjure into print a hypothesis that has been floating around in my brain for years now. Listening to my wife relay the struggles of one (of many) of her “Katie” coworkers who’s husband no longer apparently strives to advance at his job, or keep the lawn mowed satisfactorily- I often think to myself, “Well of course, why would he?, she’s gotten fat and ungrateful” I hadn’t thought it thru fully in terms of the greater social construct, but you’ve done a beautiful job at it here (even though I don’t know what an egregore is). Keep it up.
My wife absolutely insisted that the kids go to daycare in the building where I worked so I'd be tied to daycare hours and not flexible in my work hours. She insisted I watch them all weekend pretty much every weekend when they were little. Now that they're a little older and don't require as much energy she tells me I'm the one that should focus on my career. I'm the one who helps them with their homework and/or checks it to make sure they did it right. She just wants to push all of the heavy lifting onto me. The selfishness is really shocking sometimes.
Interesting article. Nice to see the "unsanitized" politically incorrect observation of men. My main advice to the woman who just wanted to be a supportive wife and stay at home mom is do NOT go to college. That's the mistake I made. Went to college got a degree and a good job thinking this would somehow make me a better future wife. Problem is that when a woman begins to earn more than the cost of daycare then her husband doesn't want her to stay at home. The 50 hours that's spent at her job/commute will take away from husband, sex, kids, cleaning and cooking because a day only has 24 hours. Men if you want your wife to do more for you then support her going part time or staying home.
"Went to college got a degree and a good job thinking this would somehow make me a better future wife."
It might not make you a "better" wife, but it will keep you a wife longer than any less educated demographic.
" Problem is that when a woman begins to earn more than the cost of daycare then her husband doesn't want her to stay at home."
That's a risk that comes with being part of the demographic in the USA that has the most chance of a long marriage: a couple where both spouses are university graduated and professionally employed.
What selection of men is available to women who don't have college degrees?
As a woman, I don't want anything to do with that selection. That may sound harsh, but it's the truth in the 21st C.
As many problems as there are with the modern college experience for young women, getting a good degree (i.e. STEM) will allow a woman to socialize with men that have higher earning potential, higher socio-economic standing, and fewer socio-cultural problems.
Right. As if a high IQ man from a stable, upper-middle class, cultured and highly educated family is going to marry a woman who graduated high school to work the drive-thru at Taco Bell just because she's cute. The Manosphere is trying to sell women on this idea but you never see examples of it in real life.
Disagree, look at the Mormons. Almost all of the women go to college now because they recognize that even SAHMs must be sufficiently educated about many aspects of the world to teach their young children and/or homeschool them as they grow older. Education is not a loss when looked at from this perspective.
Going to college and getting a degree in a solid field (something STEM) also means that you will be around smarter, higher quality men who will earn enough to support a SAHM and kids. Assortative mating is a real phenomenon. The higher in status one's social milieu, the better quality of mates you can choose from.
Bingo Nora! These men that say, "we don't care what education level women have we just want them to be good looking and agreeable" are really displaying what socio-cultural class they come from. Jews, Asians, Indians and people who come from classy, traditional and family oriented cultures absolutely DO care about a wife's educational background. And their parents care very much about a potential daughter-in-law's social and professional status. If their son is a neuro-surgeon they want their daughter-in-law to be a heart surgeon. Highly educated American women would do well to look into the demographic of 2nd generation immigrants for dating and marriage.
You think being a surgeon is high status (middle class striver with chip on shoulder) and look down your nose at "those crude whites." Most likely brown.
I said, "Jews, Asians, Indians and people who come from classy, traditional and family oriented cultures absolutely DO care about a wife's educational background. "
European Jews are white. And there are also non-Jewish white people who "come from classy, traditional and family oriented cultures."
While I don't "look down my nose" at lower class people (of any ethnicity), in the USA they are the least likely to marry, and the most likely to divorce if they do marry. The demographic with the greatest marriage longevity here are couples where both spouses are university graduated and professionally employed.
Clever. Mechanical. Callow. I finally see that we're all just fuckseeking fleshbots. No mention of children aside from the 3 blonde androids. It takes constant, total love, devotion, intelligence, spirit etc to raise the human child even if his fucksource feels hard-done-by on the road or in the pits. The real test of our civilisation will come when all the fuck-produce, raised in broken homes and low-wage daycare factories becomes the ruling generation. We're getting a good look at many of them now. The Great Reset will be a perfect fit for them. What a lucky coincidence that it's all lined up ready to go.
How old are you by the way? Not old enough yet to realise that there is more to civilised adult life than fucking.
If you subtract the vitriol and implied self-loathing, the ASs does raise a salient point: virginity is a pearl of great price, but fertility is a prize beyond price. There's no point in the dance between the two halves that make a whole wherein all things stop and stay. Even as we age, we are able to generate beautiful things, things worth fighting for, things worth dying for, even things worth killing for. Children are the gift, the ROI for the hardship and suffering. What use is a man that gains a whole kingdom and has no son to hand it off to? What value has a woman who makes and keeps a wonderful home that echoes the sad silence of sterility?
Your point was well made, and I congratulate you on absolutely nailing it. Nothing I've said here subtracts from that. Offspring are a whole other topic, inextricably intertwined yet undeniably separate. I, for one, would earnestly wish to see what you could produce on the topic of children and wholeness as it applies to the beast with two backs.
thank you for kind words — i have twitter thred on topic of wholeness (romantic passion in particular, but fertility is piece of this), but maybe I turn it into an essay.
please be more specific, what aspect of children? I have considered writing something, perhaps as complement to this piece, about the need for new fertility rites
From a working mom point of view, feminism has degraded motherhood without any repercussions. Being a stay at home mom is looked upon with scorn by both women and other men. Heck even the church is now lothe to promote mom's raising their own families as this may decrease their revenue if the parishioners make less. My angst is that these often obese pants-suit wearing women with partially shaved heads and who cant decide which shade of blue to dye their hair have the gall to criticize women for taking the "submissive " role and staying true to their husbands . These same nasty creatures get to pay an equal amount into social security and draw out an equal amount. Yet it is mine and other women's offspring who will be working to subsidize their retirement. Being a working parent is what more difficult just a working adult. For each child claimed on taxes 2% less should be taken out in the social security payroll tax. 4 or more kids and no social security tax paid by either parent so long as they remain wedded. The fluzies who die their hair and scream at injustice will have to pay more monetarily for their lack of contributions to future generations .
I think you'd be surprised how hungry we'll be to build conditions to do it better than the empty narcissism under which we were raised... but we probably won't go Neopaulite, much as the elite would like that. We like that we're less-likely to force people into repressive situations. I bet you'll see a society that has less spit and polish and hardier bones.
Great article man. Also subscribed off this. Substack can be super dry and colorless. Or too memey and amateur hour. Your writing is a good balance of personal approach with jokes in the right places along with heavier insight utilizing big concepts and shit. It makes for a fun, enjoyable and thoughtful read. I genuinely hope you keep it up dude
When I got married the last time, and I do mean the *last* time, I remember first seeing my personals date and thinking, "she's not as cute in real life as she was in her photos." But her personality hooked me, and her familiarity with outdoor activities like camping clinched the deal. I also figured her less-than-beautiful body might make her more loyal, glad to have secured a financially solid and reliable husband in spite of her shortcomings in the looks department. Boy, was I wrong. Instead it made her pathologically insecure, a classic example of what I call "jealousy disorder" where her auto-generated fantasies of my infidelity, in the absence of any evidence, became so crippling that her escape from the marriage on any pretext was her only path to mental peace. So there must be a happy medium someplace between fat & ugly making a woman hopelessly insecure, or thin & beautiful making a woman permanently in trade-up mode every time they spot a richer man.
This is something me and the boys occasionally go back and forth about. So you're telling me a less attractive woman can also give this much trouble?? If you don't mind can you be honest did you do anything to raise her suspicions? Let men help men.
Absolutely nothing - I'm the hardest-working, most stay-at-home guy any woman could ask for. I didn't have time or energy to fool around. It's amazing that what I call "jealousy disorder" isn't talked about more. It might be the most common phobia out there: a fear of infidelity that generates fantasies, then the fantasies are repeatedly thought about until they become real in the mind of the phobic partner. It's like people can be terrified of crossing a bridge because they think it will collapse while they're on it, even though they've never seen a bridge collapse.
Average to bad looking woman sometimes are the worst, as they cling to every single drop of male attention due to their low self-esteem.
Some of most awkward openings I had from women in my life were from 4 to 6 girlfriends and wives from friends and colleagues. They were in a hunt, all the time.
It's very much not that simple. I've had oinkers and i've had beautiful women and both can have mental disorders. Or not.
For me, the game changer was recovery. Examining myself closely made me realize why I was interested in losers. When we end up with them, it's our own fault. In my case, a complex web from childhood of broken relationships, alcoholics and weird immature ideas about how I wasn't going to have that kind of life.
Then I went and replicated it for 30+ years. Until I learned some simple rules about acceptance, detachment and boundaries. A few corollaries sprinkled atop that. Unfortunately, to learn it requires you to acquire 'the gift of desperation' aka humility and realize you have no control over anything but yourself.
Lack of rigor. No stats for controversial or specific points.
Under estimation of male flexibility of motivation. Men will work to get their drugs and waifus. WEF policy of sedation has been highly effective so far. High productivity is neither necessary nor desired.
Over estimation of female desire for men when other needs are satisfied.
Thank you for the study on tipping of ovulating strippers. That is of interest to me.
This is a clever projection. Any intelligent individual not muddied with present societal cacophony can see how this or something close is steadily in the works. Intentional denial or something else.
I work with some Katies. It has opened my eyes to how fortunate I am to not be in their shoes. There's an element of mercilessness amongst them. I'm glad my will is strong enough.
You're right. The cisfeminist movement only opposed all access to substitutes to mid ciswomen: Transition access, sex work, companion bots, and erotica, because of deep moral conviction and not because they're V-PEC at all.
Whoa, Nellie! That’s some inside sex politics baseball. No comprendo. I had a Honda with a VTEC engine, but I’m guessing that’s wide of the mark. I’m just saying that you can’t make all these apocalyptic projections based on moonbeams and pixie dust.
Whoops Or you're just so lazy and scared that you can't confront the truth of the reality men and women are heading to and will lazily partake in the delusions or wishful thinking that we'll somehow be fine.
What say you, WT where do you think we're headed in the west. With the social dynamics off and everything pointing towards not so good results for both men and women where do you see us going?
The problems are manifold and impact us in sn accelerating, invasive fashion. In general there is a loss of trust across the entire spectrum of Western society. There is also a strong social trend in America and the West toward not taking responsibility for one’s decisions and actions: blaming other people for one’s problems, selfishness, being an entitled spoiled brat, failing to be an adult. There is a deliberate breakdown in traditional stabilizing social institutions driven by long term activities on the Left. There is the sense by at least 1/2 of the American population that there is coordinated, malevolent top down effort to create chaos and harm the citizenry in a variety of ways: economically, medically, and from a security standpoint. The other half are asleep, retarded, or Commies. All this stuff makes it hard to form relationships, which is a primary objective of the forces driving these changes.
As regards relationships between the sexes, men have been displaced from traditional roles and so have women, under the fake guise of “liberation”. I’m not talking about reasonable ideas like equal work for equal pay, encouraging women to aspire to be whatever they want, or prohibiting sexual harassment. I’m talking about the devaluation of men by our intelligentsia and media, the absurd negation of biological physical realities, and the simultaneous lies that women have been told in order to dismantle the nuclear family. Women are encouraged to act like men. Why? Aren’t women fine as women? Aren’t men supposed to be men? Are women happier in an atomized society without stable relationships? Is anybody? The fact that we even gave to have this conversation is ridiculous on its face. Who wants to fuck, or even dare I say fall in love, when there is no spontaneity because of woke invented behavioral rules, everybody has their nose in their iPhone 24/7 and oh by the way there’s a new fabricated crisis every twenty minutes? “Try not to die today from some new civilization ending scourge.” isn’t exactly exciting foreplay. So no I don’t think we are fine. We have to get back to basics and common sense. We all want love and attention and respect. We get there by treating one another well, in person. Real contact.We get there by recognizing that social institutions predicated on hundreds of thousands of years of evolution are tried and tested and deserve careful preservation. Western civilization didn’t happen by some accident. Allowing unhappy and manipulative elements to tear it down for some pseudo intellectual trendy shit that will be gone in a few years( because it doesn’t work for anybody really except sociopaths) is dangerous and infantile. So no, I don’t think it’s all fine. And it’s going to get worse before it gets better. But it will get better, because reality always wins in the end. The decadent stupidity we are experiencing now is not a survivable long term strategy. Eventually men and women will return to a stable paradigm. It will be different than today and different than the past superficially. But at the end of the day, most people are going to be people, not fanatics who deny their humanity. Political systems, belief systems, and sexual relationship dynamics in contravention of human nature are eventually doomed to failure. And so is fanatical hatred and systems that leverage hostility as a motivator. Hatred burns out.
This is excellent. Thank you. My generation (early boomer so-to-speak) met “at school” when there was less censorship of ideas. We stumbled together and many of us have endured, holding more so-called conservative social values than we imagined. Life is hard work and maintaining functional relationships is even more difficult. 50 years in September; always rocky seas, but still in the same boat.
most incredible article i've read in at least a year. i really need to up my IQ on these male-female sexual dynamics in the modern era in order to better understand the Big Picture. tremendous. thank you.
"Kegan stage 4+" does not impart any sexual value to a woman. Intelligence, by any measure, does not improve her suitability for reproduction except as regards child safety absent her male guardian.
Women generally succumb to social pressure. Too many women suffer from knowledge enough to escape protective mores, but insufficient to comprehend the alternatives destroy female opportunity and render female success impossible. A wise woman intentionally ignores every body of knowledge which leads to ruin.
Want proof women bereft of beauty may succeed with clever application of labor specialization? Arnold Swarzenegger had a maid you must know.
Apologies for the late response. I lost a longer reply so I'll make this reply brief.
Cooperation is a better indicator for reproductive success than (brute) intelligence. The data supporting the reproductive argument favoring paternal investment in "traditional" marriage is voluminous and weighty. Data supporting maternal intelligence is sparse. Intuitively, smart women could "fool" desirable men into making low investment sexual decisions, but they don't make such decisions at the aggregate level. A woman could even arrange "convenient" marriage to a man, assuming his risks were low to contract a marriage, and especially if his exit costs were low. Yet, that's not what's happening in practice. "Smart" women don't marry and don't birth several children (with notable exceptions).
For you personally, I wonder if you want a (lesbian) "partner with a brain" or an intelligent spouse for procreation. The former isn't relevant to the conversation. Speaking from experience, the intelligence of my spouse (less than mine, more than average) isn't as beneficial to our children as our unity of purpose seeking their success. Short term, her aesthetic appeal increased my sexual interest. Her intelligence wasn't really that relevant in those hours even if contributes at other times
Regarding the aesthetic comments from others regarding your appearance, I'd hazard from your profile image that you need to pursue weight loss to improve your longevity, but are otherwise genetically fit for reproduction. I'm not a doctor, though, so my opinion may be at odds with the opinion of your physician. I know that every time I ask my doctor about my belly fat, he asks if I want diet pills, so there's no real help there.
Do you lift? It's physically and socially beneficial.
I did a lot more weight before access to public accommodations was predicated on a sterilizing medical procedure. You being cis-identified are probably new to these conditions. I've been dealing with the stick and other stick model for a long while.
I'd hazard you don't understand fat is a symptom, as Dr. Malone discovered during COVID (BMI is a lagging indicator of blood sugar) and that you didn't take calculus. I'm not bothering to continue, since you don't understand the difference between location and velocity. Tah.
Genius article — Civilization was built upon shaming women, and Feminism flipped the dynamic to shaming men.
I've never seen this dynamic stated so concisely and articulately before.
This article called it over 10 years ago.
To provide 'beta' men an incentive to produce far more economic output than needed just to support themselves while simultaneously controlling the hypergamy of women that would deprive children of interaction with their biological fathers, all major religions constructed an institution to force constructive conduct out of both genders while penalizing the natural primate tendencies of each. This institution was known as 'marriage'. Societies that enforced monogamous marriage made sure all beta men had wives, thus unlocking productive output out of these men who in pre-modern times would have had no incentive to be productive. Women, in turn, received a provider, a protector, and higher social status than unmarried women, who often were trapped in poverty. When applied over an entire population of humans, this system was known as 'civilization'.
https://www.singularity2050.com/2010/01/the-misandry-bubble.html
Thank you for linking this, it is very good. It is true that these dynamics were present even then, but as some say, markets have a tendency to remain irrational longer than one would expect.
For all who don't like coarse language and want more charts, please read!
Wow. This is why I love substack. I doubt I would have ever come across any of this and it’s so necessary to understand wtf is happening rn!
Heartiste documented all this quite a while ago. Of course he was banned from Wordpress for it, but some kind soul archived the site:
https://heartiste.org/
Not to brag, but I received numerous Comment of the Week awards for my postings on Heartiste.
I'm impressed!
One of the early pioneers. Glad it's still available.
Now you know why they want to shut it down.
His January 1, 2020 followup unpacked what's actually happened in those ten years very well. It's also obvious that in those ten years he's become intimately familiar with the Manosphere, which really emerged as a phenomenon of its own over that decade.
A really fascinating article.
This is one of the most on-point, cleared-headed, perfectly articulated pieces I've read anywhere. Thanks for sharing it.
I remember this now - thanks for the reminder!
Thanks for the link, what a great essay.
Men were shamed too, in the form of simply being killed for not fulfilling their masculine end of the civilizational contract. There has never been a time in which men lived without being under the threat of serious shame.
How old are you traditionists? I am old enough to know how unhappy marriages were in the 1950s. Your fantasy concept of how it all was is just that - a fantasy. The stress on men was very high. Women were bored and unfulfilled. You should be trying to make a more egalitarian society work well. Your little project is doomed because you make men more and more irrelevant.
You didn't even understand the point of his essay. He never mentioned happiness of individuals; he is discussing the importance of incentives that enable civilization. You are what, a Boomer? Born into the most economically prosperous era in human history, yet you don't even realize how such a situation comes about practically, which is why the world you are leaving for the following generations is so shit. Your generation is the most entitled and foolish to walk the face of the earth, perhaps ever. Your last sentence that this "little project is doomed because you make men more and more irrelevant" is proof that you totally missed the author's argument. The moment men become irrelevant is the moment the lights shut off and the water stops running. Women as a whole do not have the capacity to maintain civilizational infrastructure. You are probably incensed by this article because you are a mid all grown up, and you hate looking in the rearview mirror to see the damage that the wicked ideology known as feminism has caused.
Boomers did not cause all the problems you ascribe to them. The greatest gen did all the damage. Civil rights movement, the welfare state, relaxed divorce laws. That is the work of boomers
I agree that the so-called greatest gen, as well as the silent gen, laid the groundwork for the societal calamity that has become the U.S. in 2025, however those generations were themselves by and large virtuous people who just had naive principles. The boomers on the other hand have little virtue to speak of as a cohort. Greed, selfishness, materialism, and foolishness are the traits that define the post-war brats. Is it their parents' responsibility that is how they turned out? Perhaps. But a 60+ year-old man who still blames his parents for his behavior is truly a baby masquerading as an adult. A better epithet for those born between '45-'65 may be the babes, for they never weaned off a generous system and now expect men in our 20s to pay for their ice cream and toys.
I was born in 1963. So I am barely a boomer. As a young man I desperately wanted to opt out of the social security ponzi scheme, however that is not possible. I had to pay my dues just like everyone else. Which means I had to pay for the generation before me, just like you will have to do. It was not my decision, nor was it any boomer's decision to comingle the social security trust fund with the general operational budget of the US.
I find these generational comparisons tiresome. THere is no evidence that millennials are more lazy than anyone else. There is no evidence that Gen Z is any better or worse than any other generation. There is no evidence that boomers are uniquely evil in some way that any other generation was. I will note that none of the evil dictators (hitler, stalin, mao) were boomers
Barely a boomer, I respect you if what you are saying is true. When SS is cancelled by a regime more favorable to the interests of young men, I would not be opposed to paying out a dividend to those of your cohort who actually paid into such a system. The issue is that many of your fellows (kids of '63) lived as grasshoppers, fiddling away in the summer of youth and now expect me to pay for a happy retirement that is undeserved. I do not need to give examples, although I could of boomers crying over a supposed "fixed income" which is nothing more than the results of practical foolishness (lack of savings).
It may be tiresome to compare generations if you feel unaligned with yours, although I certainly see many flaws with my peers. However, you grew up in a drastically different culture and society than I did 40 years later, and to ignore how that difference impacts people grouped together even simply by age is a bit facetious. Clearly kids that grew up with only 3 TV channels will have a different outlook than kids that had access to the panoply of the internet. I think what you may find tiresome is realizing is that the world has been on a downward spiral, certainly in a moral sense, since the 60s that has largely continued during your generations period of greatest influence. Perhaps, it did not begin with you, but it has continued under you. Each generation has flaws as well as strengths, and there will be good people born in each era, however, to ignore the differences in culture that I was born into compared with yourself would be naive.
Lol. A whole article about incentives for an anthropomorphized 'civilization' and a complete ignorance of the incentives for half of the individuals who collectively make it up. Blind men and elephants....
Total expropriation of all boomer wealth.
Women were told they were bored and unfulfilled. Women fall for all kinds of programming.
I dont necessarily disagree, though I have taken the “traditionalist” route I suppose personally in my life and marriage, as has my wife, but, was it worse, in aggregate, than what we have now, in aggregate? I think too many cats are out of too many bags to actually go full on traditionalist societally, but I think a move in that direction a bit would make things more egalitarian at this point. I also disagree with the author on men not wanting to work hard to keep everything going. I work in a trade anmost of the guys I work with are divorced. Their lives suck but now they have to work extra hard, not less hard.
Dishonest
it's incredible, and the metaphors are delicious. it also forced me to familiarize myself with certain memes/acronyms/neologisms i'm still unfamiliar with.
Why should anyone be shamed? Much less entire groups of people? If an individual does something truly shameful (and that varies from culture to culture, even person to person) then ok, some "shaming" from people who truly care about them might be justified. But personal guilt arising from one's own sense of right and wrong works far more efficiently. Guilt and shame are two different things. Shame based cultures and guilt based cultures are very different.
Individual guilt didn't prevent or stop the atrocities of the Nazis or communists from being repeated. It was shaming their entire nations did it.
The same applies to things which aren't atrocities. Self-contemplation is not as effective as having everyone point and laugh and throw rotten cabbage.
There are a LOT of people who never develop a mature sense of right and wrong, or learn the discipline to follow it; and it only takes one of them to burn down a police station or a place of worship, or in olden times, a barn full of the town’s seed corn. Not everyone is can be a philosopher king or a warrior poet.
It's probably unavoidable in any society.
Shame is the only thing they respond to, they have no guilt
Good times create entitled mid women
Entitled mid women create bad times
Bad times create mid women who settle
Mid women settling creates good times
you sir completed the missing Women part in civilization Cycle!
-Good times create entitled mid women
-Entitled mid women create indifferent/weak men
-Indifferent/weak men create bad times
-Bad times create mid women who settle
-Mid women settling creates strong/productive men
-Strong productive men create good times
What are mid women?
they are the average women.
think of a population distribution that it has 3 categories high value/attractive women, mind value/attractive women, and low value/attractive women.
the biggest population % are mid-women so they are the biggest factor to influence the sex market and society.
OK so mid means average. Most people are average, hence the word "average". I've seen "mid" used as an insult. By sub-5, below average men.
That’s genius Patrick.
Weird dynamic in the contemporary dating scene is that even as the sex rate plummets, so does female attractiveness. It's weird because in essence it's getting harder to find a partner, meaning partners are more expensive. To a considerable degree this is due to men removing themselves from the dating market, or simply not showing up (see: college campuses). Since this imbalance nominally corresponds to women being cheaper commodities for those still in the game, you'd think females would respond by trying to increase their SMV in order to compete, but nah, instead you get green hair, obesity, general personality bitchiness. The feminist mind parasite seems more than capable of motivating destructive female behavior in the face of market pressures. So, this continues for a while, probably.
The other thing, of course, is how many mid men just say fuck it and seek marriageable wives elsewhere? Latin America, Eastern Europe, Asia all offer good alternatives. Somewhat perversely, this could provide the sexual motivation to keep civilization ticking along, while locking white women out of the marriage market. There'd be a certain poetic justice to that.
This has been my basic take for a long time. Women have gotten incredibly demanding at the same time they've gotten incredibly undesirable. The overshoot is amazing and I expect the consequences will be as well.
Absolutely right on the money, Sir! I cannot tell you how prevalent it is for smart men ‘in the know’ to bail for 6 months or so to Thailand, Ukraine(pre-war) even parts of the Middle East and ultimately come merrily home with their bride-to-be in tow! Women in those types of places have not yet been tainted and sullied by the knowledge of the West via the brainwashing of this ‘modern woman’ farce foisted upon girls here starting in the 80’s by society convincing them that “girl, you don’t need no man!” “You getcha’ college degree and you’ll be independent and thus never be happier!” What a fucking load of shit that is! This world is turned upside down on it’s head in every way, as this is an integral part of the overall larger, horrific, shitshow maelstrom we’ve got bearing down on us as men……buckle up, cause it’s gonna be a bumpy road!
Yes, by far the best bet for most is to find a nice girl in such regions. Problem is finding such women, clueless travelers might meet the wrong types via adverse selection.
It might be possible for men in the know to more quickly coordinate such attractive matches ... one American man introduces the nice cousin of his Uruguayan wife to another, etc. This would not be difficult to implement publicly with e.g. a website, could also be more informal. Enterprising men wishing to make a positive impact — this may be one such approach.
Agreed…of course. Fittingly, there’s a famous Polish saying as follows : Każdy horror ma swojego kochanka. Translated it means - “Every horror has her lover” meaning that no matter how terribly undesirable, unattractive, unbecoming and a cum dumpster skank a woman is, there is always some chump to give her the time of day. Women will always have that power of the P! The saying is much more powerful and meaningful when said in Polish to a Pole, but you get the idea…Anyway, yes, careful selection of a girl brought up in a strict household not exposed to too much ‘Western’ culture is the key or at least finding one that is studiously aware of the pitfalls of the ‘Modern independent woman’ lie is of utmost importance and said quest must be undertaken with the utmost diligence, patience and caution for a long term successful wife/mother of one’s progeny!
You could probably pick up a nice catch right now in Ukraine.
Its a buyers market, sadly!
This is a nice idea in theory, until you actually experience the difficultly of cross-cultural relationships. Even for couples who are both from Europe(Finn/Italian or Irish/Spanish), cross-cultural differences can be challenging to maintaining a relationship long-term.
There can also be other problems: I know a group of a few American men who all found Thai women and brought them back to the US to marry. The women were very sweet & subservient until after the marriages when they all turned into raging harpies.
There's no cross-cultural differences. Everyone is human. The values are absolute.
Nonsense.
I would like to hear more details/arguments.
Something, something, politics, law changes, camps, etc. Star belly vs Circle belly, etc.
totally agree with you, but let's not forget that there are a multitude of forces driving this phenomenon you describe of degrading average female desirability. it's not entirely ideologically-driven, or at least, it's not entirely driven by the evil known as 'feminism'.
That's certainly true. Like most phenomena, it has a multivariate origin. In fact, I'd argue that feminism as an ideological driving force is itself much more symptom than cause. Economics, adulteration of the food supply, side effects from the Pill and SSRIs, all play an important role at both biological and psychological levels.
i don't know enough to comparatively weigh the varying forces driving this degradation of female (and male?) attractiveness, but of course you're listing massive drivers. we're definitely on the same page.
Given that these drivers are not actually going away, it seems that the breakdown in the 'civilizational contract' between Men and Women will also not go away, even when it has negative outcomes for individuals and society as a whole. In this case, the cultural and sociological conforming forces would need to be set against the underlying causes, rather than reinforcing them. But its an uphill battle...
A theory of mine is that feminism invades a culture about 15 years after vegetable oil is introduced into the food supply.
Feminism is a jewish tool to weaken Europeans, but that’s an interesting theory you have
You could argue, 'To weaken the WEAK Europeans.' Natural selection with the Hermetic helping hand.
What about the Jesuits?
Naw bro, I blame the Canadians.
Yeah when I look up who runs all the banks and media companies, they're all owned by Canadians.
For those young man, be very careful with Brazil. The country in Latin America which is the one most obsessed in copying every single bad idea from America.
Brazilian laws are deeply misandrist, the judges are worse and the woman in some states are complete buccaneers.
I see WAY more women with plastic surgery than with green hair.
The bitchy, obese, green-haired stereotype is not trying to date typical men anyway... They date in their trans/nonbinary/pansexual circles. This is a red herring.
It seems like you are ignoring that the dating market as a whole is a bad bargain for women. Why would they engage in it if all they get from it is more work?
Okay, but I like green hair and forceful personalities, and the obesity is the result of another bad idea we unnecessarily adopted during the Mid-20th Century.
one look at some of the popular culture from the 50s to 70s shows how precipitous the fall has been. Demure, graceful and modest women who spoke with a sing song cadence - thinking of Star trek and the twilight zone - has given way to shrill, obnoxious, unfeminine, neurotic and undesirable femoids from the 90s onwards who think that playpen between their legs is itself enough to make them a prize for anyone. I wonder how and when this happened or if this was a result of conscious and subtle social engineering after the sexual liberation movement.
The powers put fluoride in the drinking water creating a persecution psychosis predominantly in women, which also has the 'benefit' of libidinous licentiousness and the rest was history. https://ariaveritas.substack.com/p/waiter-theres-a-persecution-psychosis
The true fact is women bring nothing to a modern relationship. No reason for men to commit for the amount of loss incurred.
Can 100% confirm. They can't cook. They can't clean. They have entitiled attitudes. They are in love with their phones.
I love joking with my GF that it's time for ladies to stand outside my window and play 'In Your Eyes' for me.
Remember Gents....you are the PRIZE not her.
EXACTLY!!!
We’re the bag, NOT her……..EVER!!!!
For anyone reading this I’d highly recommend checking out Kevin Samuels’ YouTube channel.
https://youtu.be/KL9D0N2tyoM
Unfortunately, he unexpectedly passed away in May but his channel lives on in infamy! Kevin is SO well versed on this subject and is flat-out hilarious to boot! I cannot recommend him highly enough!
Unexpectedly died, you say? Sounds like a p-zombie to me. And we're not considering what the Midwit Remover, sold as protection against the Boomer Remover, is going to do to this dynamic over the next decade. Less likely to kill those with XX karyotypes, it's also clearly causing mass infertility.
Think being an outlier is sold as sexy now? Wait until 10 years of actual fertility backs it up. That stripper stat was an amazing data point for me.
What point? Woman demand more than they put into relationships. No value. Best way to break up is hold them to their standards.
Nope. Lmao
The Bible is absolutely true.
Husbands, love your wives.
Wives, respect your husbands.
Adultery is a sin. Fornication is a sin.
Marriage should be 1 virgin male marrying 1 virgin female...for life.
Marriage is not all about sex...there is a higher purpose, which is to reflect the pattern of Christ and His church while raising godly children.
Agreed. Both men and women are happiest in a solid marriage with children and the traditional family structure.....in fact I believe it is the healthiest way to live.
... and your reply sounds Kegan 2, IQ <110
As a self-identified "mid man" how do you feel about being lumped in with the very problematic incel subculture?
One more thing…
This generation has suffered the greatest and virtually unknown loss of a magnitude that NO ONE can measure:
The almost complete loss of the life changing beauty and the utter and complete soul satisfaction of a sexual union that is born out of true love.
The cheap/uber-sad substitute:
push-button Cosmopolitan magazine machinations.
Marriage is the earthly union of Man and Woman united on their journey to Heaven.
Anything else is just an excuse for Lawyers to steal your money.
Truly great and insightful piece. Instant subscribe from me. You were able to conjure into print a hypothesis that has been floating around in my brain for years now. Listening to my wife relay the struggles of one (of many) of her “Katie” coworkers who’s husband no longer apparently strives to advance at his job, or keep the lawn mowed satisfactorily- I often think to myself, “Well of course, why would he?, she’s gotten fat and ungrateful” I hadn’t thought it thru fully in terms of the greater social construct, but you’ve done a beautiful job at it here (even though I don’t know what an egregore is). Keep it up.
My wife absolutely insisted that the kids go to daycare in the building where I worked so I'd be tied to daycare hours and not flexible in my work hours. She insisted I watch them all weekend pretty much every weekend when they were little. Now that they're a little older and don't require as much energy she tells me I'm the one that should focus on my career. I'm the one who helps them with their homework and/or checks it to make sure they did it right. She just wants to push all of the heavy lifting onto me. The selfishness is really shocking sometimes.
If you give her an inch, she'll take an ell. "Selfishness" means nothing to such people
The man needs to lead
Thank you for anecdote.
Hmmm. Aren't you concerned she might rub off on your wife? You know as per "her work environment"
Interesting article. Nice to see the "unsanitized" politically incorrect observation of men. My main advice to the woman who just wanted to be a supportive wife and stay at home mom is do NOT go to college. That's the mistake I made. Went to college got a degree and a good job thinking this would somehow make me a better future wife. Problem is that when a woman begins to earn more than the cost of daycare then her husband doesn't want her to stay at home. The 50 hours that's spent at her job/commute will take away from husband, sex, kids, cleaning and cooking because a day only has 24 hours. Men if you want your wife to do more for you then support her going part time or staying home.
"Went to college got a degree and a good job thinking this would somehow make me a better future wife."
It might not make you a "better" wife, but it will keep you a wife longer than any less educated demographic.
" Problem is that when a woman begins to earn more than the cost of daycare then her husband doesn't want her to stay at home."
That's a risk that comes with being part of the demographic in the USA that has the most chance of a long marriage: a couple where both spouses are university graduated and professionally employed.
What selection of men is available to women who don't have college degrees?
As a woman, I don't want anything to do with that selection. That may sound harsh, but it's the truth in the 21st C.
As many problems as there are with the modern college experience for young women, getting a good degree (i.e. STEM) will allow a woman to socialize with men that have higher earning potential, higher socio-economic standing, and fewer socio-cultural problems.
Right. As if a high IQ man from a stable, upper-middle class, cultured and highly educated family is going to marry a woman who graduated high school to work the drive-thru at Taco Bell just because she's cute. The Manosphere is trying to sell women on this idea but you never see examples of it in real life.
That's not a 10 4...
Disagree, look at the Mormons. Almost all of the women go to college now because they recognize that even SAHMs must be sufficiently educated about many aspects of the world to teach their young children and/or homeschool them as they grow older. Education is not a loss when looked at from this perspective.
Going to college and getting a degree in a solid field (something STEM) also means that you will be around smarter, higher quality men who will earn enough to support a SAHM and kids. Assortative mating is a real phenomenon. The higher in status one's social milieu, the better quality of mates you can choose from.
Bingo Nora! These men that say, "we don't care what education level women have we just want them to be good looking and agreeable" are really displaying what socio-cultural class they come from. Jews, Asians, Indians and people who come from classy, traditional and family oriented cultures absolutely DO care about a wife's educational background. And their parents care very much about a potential daughter-in-law's social and professional status. If their son is a neuro-surgeon they want their daughter-in-law to be a heart surgeon. Highly educated American women would do well to look into the demographic of 2nd generation immigrants for dating and marriage.
We get it, you're non-white, upset about that, and want to feel better about yourself.
Wait, what? What about my comment gives you the impression I'm not white?
You think being a surgeon is high status (middle class striver with chip on shoulder) and look down your nose at "those crude whites." Most likely brown.
I said, "Jews, Asians, Indians and people who come from classy, traditional and family oriented cultures absolutely DO care about a wife's educational background. "
European Jews are white. And there are also non-Jewish white people who "come from classy, traditional and family oriented cultures."
While I don't "look down my nose" at lower class people (of any ethnicity), in the USA they are the least likely to marry, and the most likely to divorce if they do marry. The demographic with the greatest marriage longevity here are couples where both spouses are university graduated and professionally employed.
Huh? Surgeon isn't high-status?
Spotted the jewess.. Have you had the rhinoplasty done yet?
Clever. Mechanical. Callow. I finally see that we're all just fuckseeking fleshbots. No mention of children aside from the 3 blonde androids. It takes constant, total love, devotion, intelligence, spirit etc to raise the human child even if his fucksource feels hard-done-by on the road or in the pits. The real test of our civilisation will come when all the fuck-produce, raised in broken homes and low-wage daycare factories becomes the ruling generation. We're getting a good look at many of them now. The Great Reset will be a perfect fit for them. What a lucky coincidence that it's all lined up ready to go.
How old are you by the way? Not old enough yet to realise that there is more to civilised adult life than fucking.
Somebody got triggered.
Yes, but she is correct about the next generation.
Someone had to do it.
This is very good comment, I enjoy.
If you subtract the vitriol and implied self-loathing, the ASs does raise a salient point: virginity is a pearl of great price, but fertility is a prize beyond price. There's no point in the dance between the two halves that make a whole wherein all things stop and stay. Even as we age, we are able to generate beautiful things, things worth fighting for, things worth dying for, even things worth killing for. Children are the gift, the ROI for the hardship and suffering. What use is a man that gains a whole kingdom and has no son to hand it off to? What value has a woman who makes and keeps a wonderful home that echoes the sad silence of sterility?
Your point was well made, and I congratulate you on absolutely nailing it. Nothing I've said here subtracts from that. Offspring are a whole other topic, inextricably intertwined yet undeniably separate. I, for one, would earnestly wish to see what you could produce on the topic of children and wholeness as it applies to the beast with two backs.
thank you for kind words — i have twitter thred on topic of wholeness (romantic passion in particular, but fertility is piece of this), but maybe I turn it into an essay.
please be more specific, what aspect of children? I have considered writing something, perhaps as complement to this piece, about the need for new fertility rites
From a working mom point of view, feminism has degraded motherhood without any repercussions. Being a stay at home mom is looked upon with scorn by both women and other men. Heck even the church is now lothe to promote mom's raising their own families as this may decrease their revenue if the parishioners make less. My angst is that these often obese pants-suit wearing women with partially shaved heads and who cant decide which shade of blue to dye their hair have the gall to criticize women for taking the "submissive " role and staying true to their husbands . These same nasty creatures get to pay an equal amount into social security and draw out an equal amount. Yet it is mine and other women's offspring who will be working to subsidize their retirement. Being a working parent is what more difficult just a working adult. For each child claimed on taxes 2% less should be taken out in the social security payroll tax. 4 or more kids and no social security tax paid by either parent so long as they remain wedded. The fluzies who die their hair and scream at injustice will have to pay more monetarily for their lack of contributions to future generations .
I think you'd be surprised how hungry we'll be to build conditions to do it better than the empty narcissism under which we were raised... but we probably won't go Neopaulite, much as the elite would like that. We like that we're less-likely to force people into repressive situations. I bet you'll see a society that has less spit and polish and hardier bones.
Cool. And thanks for all the skincare.
Great article man. Also subscribed off this. Substack can be super dry and colorless. Or too memey and amateur hour. Your writing is a good balance of personal approach with jokes in the right places along with heavier insight utilizing big concepts and shit. It makes for a fun, enjoyable and thoughtful read. I genuinely hope you keep it up dude
Thank you for the kind words and specificity, I will bear in mind.
When I got married the last time, and I do mean the *last* time, I remember first seeing my personals date and thinking, "she's not as cute in real life as she was in her photos." But her personality hooked me, and her familiarity with outdoor activities like camping clinched the deal. I also figured her less-than-beautiful body might make her more loyal, glad to have secured a financially solid and reliable husband in spite of her shortcomings in the looks department. Boy, was I wrong. Instead it made her pathologically insecure, a classic example of what I call "jealousy disorder" where her auto-generated fantasies of my infidelity, in the absence of any evidence, became so crippling that her escape from the marriage on any pretext was her only path to mental peace. So there must be a happy medium someplace between fat & ugly making a woman hopelessly insecure, or thin & beautiful making a woman permanently in trade-up mode every time they spot a richer man.
This is something me and the boys occasionally go back and forth about. So you're telling me a less attractive woman can also give this much trouble?? If you don't mind can you be honest did you do anything to raise her suspicions? Let men help men.
Absolutely nothing - I'm the hardest-working, most stay-at-home guy any woman could ask for. I didn't have time or energy to fool around. It's amazing that what I call "jealousy disorder" isn't talked about more. It might be the most common phobia out there: a fear of infidelity that generates fantasies, then the fantasies are repeatedly thought about until they become real in the mind of the phobic partner. It's like people can be terrified of crossing a bridge because they think it will collapse while they're on it, even though they've never seen a bridge collapse.
Average to bad looking woman sometimes are the worst, as they cling to every single drop of male attention due to their low self-esteem.
Some of most awkward openings I had from women in my life were from 4 to 6 girlfriends and wives from friends and colleagues. They were in a hunt, all the time.
It's very much not that simple. I've had oinkers and i've had beautiful women and both can have mental disorders. Or not.
For me, the game changer was recovery. Examining myself closely made me realize why I was interested in losers. When we end up with them, it's our own fault. In my case, a complex web from childhood of broken relationships, alcoholics and weird immature ideas about how I wasn't going to have that kind of life.
Then I went and replicated it for 30+ years. Until I learned some simple rules about acceptance, detachment and boundaries. A few corollaries sprinkled atop that. Unfortunately, to learn it requires you to acquire 'the gift of desperation' aka humility and realize you have no control over anything but yourself.
Some valuable ideas.
Lack of rigor. No stats for controversial or specific points.
Under estimation of male flexibility of motivation. Men will work to get their drugs and waifus. WEF policy of sedation has been highly effective so far. High productivity is neither necessary nor desired.
Over estimation of female desire for men when other needs are satisfied.
Thank you for the study on tipping of ovulating strippers. That is of interest to me.
This is a clever projection. Any intelligent individual not muddied with present societal cacophony can see how this or something close is steadily in the works. Intentional denial or something else.
What do you think is clever projection? Your comment was ambiguous.
I work with some Katies. It has opened my eyes to how fortunate I am to not be in their shoes. There's an element of mercilessness amongst them. I'm glad my will is strong enough.
This is a reductive, cynical, conceptually sloppy, superficial, and lazy rant, with limited proof. Other than that, it’s pretty good.
I especially disagree with "lazy" here.
Ok.
You're right. The cisfeminist movement only opposed all access to substitutes to mid ciswomen: Transition access, sex work, companion bots, and erotica, because of deep moral conviction and not because they're V-PEC at all.
Whoa, Nellie! That’s some inside sex politics baseball. No comprendo. I had a Honda with a VTEC engine, but I’m guessing that’s wide of the mark. I’m just saying that you can’t make all these apocalyptic projections based on moonbeams and pixie dust.
Whoops Or you're just so lazy and scared that you can't confront the truth of the reality men and women are heading to and will lazily partake in the delusions or wishful thinking that we'll somehow be fine.
What say you, WT where do you think we're headed in the west. With the social dynamics off and everything pointing towards not so good results for both men and women where do you see us going?
Genuine question
Ok, since you asked…
The problems are manifold and impact us in sn accelerating, invasive fashion. In general there is a loss of trust across the entire spectrum of Western society. There is also a strong social trend in America and the West toward not taking responsibility for one’s decisions and actions: blaming other people for one’s problems, selfishness, being an entitled spoiled brat, failing to be an adult. There is a deliberate breakdown in traditional stabilizing social institutions driven by long term activities on the Left. There is the sense by at least 1/2 of the American population that there is coordinated, malevolent top down effort to create chaos and harm the citizenry in a variety of ways: economically, medically, and from a security standpoint. The other half are asleep, retarded, or Commies. All this stuff makes it hard to form relationships, which is a primary objective of the forces driving these changes.
As regards relationships between the sexes, men have been displaced from traditional roles and so have women, under the fake guise of “liberation”. I’m not talking about reasonable ideas like equal work for equal pay, encouraging women to aspire to be whatever they want, or prohibiting sexual harassment. I’m talking about the devaluation of men by our intelligentsia and media, the absurd negation of biological physical realities, and the simultaneous lies that women have been told in order to dismantle the nuclear family. Women are encouraged to act like men. Why? Aren’t women fine as women? Aren’t men supposed to be men? Are women happier in an atomized society without stable relationships? Is anybody? The fact that we even gave to have this conversation is ridiculous on its face. Who wants to fuck, or even dare I say fall in love, when there is no spontaneity because of woke invented behavioral rules, everybody has their nose in their iPhone 24/7 and oh by the way there’s a new fabricated crisis every twenty minutes? “Try not to die today from some new civilization ending scourge.” isn’t exactly exciting foreplay. So no I don’t think we are fine. We have to get back to basics and common sense. We all want love and attention and respect. We get there by treating one another well, in person. Real contact.We get there by recognizing that social institutions predicated on hundreds of thousands of years of evolution are tried and tested and deserve careful preservation. Western civilization didn’t happen by some accident. Allowing unhappy and manipulative elements to tear it down for some pseudo intellectual trendy shit that will be gone in a few years( because it doesn’t work for anybody really except sociopaths) is dangerous and infantile. So no, I don’t think it’s all fine. And it’s going to get worse before it gets better. But it will get better, because reality always wins in the end. The decadent stupidity we are experiencing now is not a survivable long term strategy. Eventually men and women will return to a stable paradigm. It will be different than today and different than the past superficially. But at the end of the day, most people are going to be people, not fanatics who deny their humanity. Political systems, belief systems, and sexual relationship dynamics in contravention of human nature are eventually doomed to failure. And so is fanatical hatred and systems that leverage hostility as a motivator. Hatred burns out.
This is excellent. Thank you. My generation (early boomer so-to-speak) met “at school” when there was less censorship of ideas. We stumbled together and many of us have endured, holding more so-called conservative social values than we imagined. Life is hard work and maintaining functional relationships is even more difficult. 50 years in September; always rocky seas, but still in the same boat.
most incredible article i've read in at least a year. i really need to up my IQ on these male-female sexual dynamics in the modern era in order to better understand the Big Picture. tremendous. thank you.
If you realize that you need to up your IQ then remember you might not be smart enough to know who’s worth listening to.
very good article
"Kegan stage 4+" does not impart any sexual value to a woman. Intelligence, by any measure, does not improve her suitability for reproduction except as regards child safety absent her male guardian.
Women generally succumb to social pressure. Too many women suffer from knowledge enough to escape protective mores, but insufficient to comprehend the alternatives destroy female opportunity and render female success impossible. A wise woman intentionally ignores every body of knowledge which leads to ruin.
Want proof women bereft of beauty may succeed with clever application of labor specialization? Arnold Swarzenegger had a maid you must know.
Intelligence is HIGHLY heritable from gestators. So... uhm, yes, it does indeed improve her long-term suitablity for reproduction.
I also, as an anti-cisfeminist feminist and lesbian, want a partner with a brain.
You're peeing in the pool
Apologies for the late response. I lost a longer reply so I'll make this reply brief.
Cooperation is a better indicator for reproductive success than (brute) intelligence. The data supporting the reproductive argument favoring paternal investment in "traditional" marriage is voluminous and weighty. Data supporting maternal intelligence is sparse. Intuitively, smart women could "fool" desirable men into making low investment sexual decisions, but they don't make such decisions at the aggregate level. A woman could even arrange "convenient" marriage to a man, assuming his risks were low to contract a marriage, and especially if his exit costs were low. Yet, that's not what's happening in practice. "Smart" women don't marry and don't birth several children (with notable exceptions).
For you personally, I wonder if you want a (lesbian) "partner with a brain" or an intelligent spouse for procreation. The former isn't relevant to the conversation. Speaking from experience, the intelligence of my spouse (less than mine, more than average) isn't as beneficial to our children as our unity of purpose seeking their success. Short term, her aesthetic appeal increased my sexual interest. Her intelligence wasn't really that relevant in those hours even if contributes at other times
Regarding the aesthetic comments from others regarding your appearance, I'd hazard from your profile image that you need to pursue weight loss to improve your longevity, but are otherwise genetically fit for reproduction. I'm not a doctor, though, so my opinion may be at odds with the opinion of your physician. I know that every time I ask my doctor about my belly fat, he asks if I want diet pills, so there's no real help there.
Do you lift? It's physically and socially beneficial.
I did a lot more weight before access to public accommodations was predicated on a sterilizing medical procedure. You being cis-identified are probably new to these conditions. I've been dealing with the stick and other stick model for a long while.
I'd hazard you don't understand fat is a symptom, as Dr. Malone discovered during COVID (BMI is a lagging indicator of blood sugar) and that you didn't take calculus. I'm not bothering to continue, since you don't understand the difference between location and velocity. Tah.
Of course you're looking to impregnate a man
Looking like that of course you do.
Looking like someone with the courage to show their face?
And boy was she fugly…….
Magnificent article. Looking forward to more. Thank you!!